Being Tested in Bella Grace
I finally succumbed and picked up a copy of the Bella Grace magazine, because the photos and art looked so peaceful, so mori girl. A special way to treat myself away from the rush of the day.
More than halfway through, I realized something: this magazine, this journal, was bringing grace, beauty and peace into the world. Sure, it occasionally got hung-up on pedicures as being something worth having, but it lingered on summer evenings and sunrises and cups of coffee (or tea). Pauses throughout the day.
And then I realized that all these authors were bloggers, like me, living their ordinary lives, but unlike me, actually documenting it.
Yes, in a beautiful Instagram way that I could never match (nor do I want to), but I found myself comparing this blog to their writing, to what I proclaimed back in November:
"I am going to be blogging about peace, love, light, joy and transformation, and my struggles to find the same. I figure by sharing struggles and learning to speak and live these things that maybe there will be more joy, more love, more peace and less and less fear of things we don't need to be afraid of."
I have about half a dozen posts written, part-written or planned and have had since February -- and it's July, people! Why haven't I posted (or finished the blogs)
I know I shouldn't compare my writing to others. Heck, I thought I had learned that lesson long ago when I wrote romance novels. I thought I learned that lesson as I learned to become an artist. But here I am, comparing.
But, no, not comparing. I am not thinking my writing is crap compared to theirs. I am not envious of their being published. (Been there, done that.) Being challenged, I think is a better word. Here is something that I've said I wanted to do but I simply have not made the time to do it and it's because I've been putting all my time into art which is a good and great thing. (And now that I can paint recognizable portraits, a miraculous thing!)
So, authors of Bella Grace, I accept your challenge. I mean, I was going to blog more this summer anyway, right?